The Freedom of Soft Cock Sex

People can experience shame around sex and their bodies – no matter what kind of equipment they’re born with.

If you or your partner has a penis, then you’ve likely had to deal with the ups and downs that can come with sex, pun intended. 

There is so much emphasis on erections or “getting hard”. But they are not necessary to have sex or experience deep intimacy. 

If a partner with a penis can’t get an erection, they may feel ashamed or embarrassed, while their partner is left wondering what’s wrong with them or if their partner isn’t attracted to them.

It’s time we take the pressure off everyone, and part of that is opening up our ideas of what sex can look like. You absolutely can have sex with a soft cock, and experience a lot of freedom in doing so.

Here’s how. 

Pleasure over orgasms

There is such an emphasis on “achieving” orgasms, for male and female-bodied people. But there’s so much more to sex than that.

When you focus on pleasure, you’re able to focus on being present and connected, with yourself and your partner. 

Focusing on pleasure means giving both of you the space to hone in on the subtle shifts of energy and sensations throughout your body and in your heart. 

Freedom of the soft cock

There’s so much pressure on people with penises to perform. To be bigger and harder. To thrust over and over. But there’s so much more to sex, to pleasure, to intimacy. 

When both parties take the pressure of what sex needs to look like, and what a penis should or shouldn’t be doing, there’s more room for exploration, for opening, and for nuanced pleasure. 

There’s so much more to male sexuality than many of us have been led to believe, and you certainly don’t need to be hard to explore it. 

How to have sex with a soft cock

There’s no right or wrong way to have sex – the same goes for sex with a soft cock. Mouth, hands, pussy, if it feels good for both of you, that’s all that matters.

One way that people explore soft cock sex is with a “lingam massage”, a tantric massage technique that focuses on the penis. Many people with penises are able to have multiple, full-body orgasms without an erection.

Here’s a quick low-down on how to do one:

1. Deeply relax. The person receiving will lay with their legs spread apart and their knees bent, they may like to use a pillow under their head or hips. 
2. Tap into your breath to start relaxing deeply. Keep breathing and use your breath to connect to each other.
3. Use lube to gently oil up the penis and testicles, starting with the thighs.
4. Move to the testicles, you can gently pull on them, slowly massaging them.
5. Massage around the testicles and penis, you can also move to the perineum (the area between the testicles and anus).
6. Move to the shaft and shift between speeds and actions (twisting, up and down, etc.)
7. There’s a focus on edging, or staying on the edge of an orgasm by slowing down when they get close.
8. You can also do an internal and external prostate massage.
9. Keep breathing and communicating the whole time. 

Lingam massage is just one of the many ways you can explore soft cock sex. Stay open to different sensations and ways to experience pleasure. 

Want to learn more about Lingam massage? You’ll find a tutorial by EJ Love inside The Golden Yoni Membership…along with a whole lot of other juicy goodness!

Discover the beauty of our Golden Yoni Membership: a nurturing sanctuary for helping women deepen their sexual connection. Led by founder Rosie Rees, journey through sensual self-discovery, sexual mastery, yoni dearmouring and powerful pelvic floor practices designed to up-level your pleasure. Access 14 enriching modules for only AUD$40 a month — equivalent to approximately $1.42 a day — to honor your feminine essence. Join our loving community, embrace monthly sisterhood circles, and grow with insightful sexpert guest appearance lectures. Welcome home to holistic love, yoni healing, and sexual self-discovery.